Over the last couple of weeks the Peacefulwife has run a series of posts on God’s Design For Marriage is Sexy which looks at some of the benefits of following God’s design. You can read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, and Part 4 here. A wife sent in an email with a story that I think is a great reminder to all of us that taking the time to connect emotionally with our wives earlier in the day can pay big dividends physically for husband and wife later. It is also another good reason to spend time together with your family around the dinner table.

The last few evenings my husband has wanted to eat dinner in front of the TV. That’s not my preference, because after dinner we often spend the evening apart–in front of our computers, reading, or whatever, but not usually directly interacting after meal time until we get ready for bed. Even though it wasn’t my favorite idea, I sat beside him and watched movies while we ate.

Then after that had gone on for a couple nights in a row, we promised each other we would have sex in the morning. When morning came we tried to make good on our promise but it was not going so well. Just “dutiful” if you know what I mean. And in the middle of that, he said, “You know what? I think we need to eat dinner together tonight. At the table. And talk.”

I smiled and agreed. Inside I was thinking, “What?! Where did THAT come from?” He made the connection before I did about how vital it was to connect emotionally so we could enjoy connecting physically. Usually it’s me who says something like, “I really need your attention and conversation before I can be ready to have sex,” but this time I was oblivious to it and right away he realized that was what our relationship needed! So cool!

So with Valentine’s Day coming this week I thought it would be a good reminder that women need a little more time and a little more connection than we do to enjoy physical intimacy. Start early and give plenty of words of anticipation so that you both will be ready when the time comes.